Don't rock the boat.
Do it this way.
You won't make it.
You're doing it wrong.
We've been taught all along
That if we don't do
What everybody else in the entire world is doing
We'll be ostracized
Exposed on YouTube in one scathing
So we hide ourselves.
Our "immature" paintings
Gather dust and spiders in the dark garage
Our manuscripts lurk in convoluted files
On our laptop
Never printed off
Unread by any but our own eyes.
We wear big t-shirts to cover up the bulges
At aerobics class.
What if we suck?
What if we really don't have what it takes?
("What it takes to what?" I ask you.)
What if we hold out our little self-made bouquet
And someone slaps it down?
What if everyone thinks we're lame?
Better to be weird
Better to be stupid, crazy, ugly, silly, ridiculous
Don't hide your paintings behind your dresser
Set them up on the lawn
With spotlights and big signs
Like a garage sale
Embrace yourself in one humongous hug
Wear tight clothing
Wear bright pink leggings
To emphasize the cellulite!
Stop apologizing for your manuscript
And send out those queries
Or, better yet
Pass your manuscript out to strangers on the street
Tell them it's you, in paper form
And they'll love it
And if they don't, you just don't care
And smile all the way
Knowing that no matter many reject you
No matter how they judge you
Find you annoying--