Relax!

Friday has really become my day to let everything go.

Weekends are like the rest of my work week. I'd make Sunday my day of rest, but I am too busy gearing up for the coming week to do that. So I'm left with Friday.

And today has an added bonus: the kids have fall break. So we're off to a state park today, braving the overcast skies and potential rain. We might not get to do paddle boating, but we'll still have fun, I bet. I'll take some pictures and post them on my Travel Tuesday this week (hopefully).

We're also taking the kids to Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat tonight. It'll be the first time they've seen it live, and I can't wait to see it again! If you don't know anything about it, it's by Andrew Lloyd Webber, the creator of The Phantom of the Opera and Jesus Christ Superstar (and a bunch of other musicals, too).

What are your fun plans for today--or for the weekend? Any relaxing on the schedule? No? Well, why not?

At least pull out a puzzle or something. Think through... what is it you really like to do that you haven't done in FAR TOO LONG?

Fun Stuff to do This Friday

Why does Friday seem to be the only day I have time to post?

And why am I up at 3:30 a.m. when I could sleep until 6:30 for once?

Yes, I've gotten myself a bit overwhelmed now, and it's taking its toll. Honestly, most of my stress comes from not having control over my environment. Sure, I can get most of my own work done--the important stuff, anyway--but I spent last night trying to attend to job as art gallery director WHILE also making sure my kids finish their homework, check up on my house when the burglar alarm went off (I think one of the door sensors isn't properly working), and juggle countless other things. Needless to say, I was not the best art gallery director last night. Very distracted.

I am convinced that distractions lead to stress--and too much of it. Multitasking is hard, and the last few weeks I've greeted Friday with a sigh, ready to take a break somewhere in my schedule, just so that I can breathe.

I figure by now that most of you are ready for a break, too. And that break is NOT made up of doing laundry all Saturday, re-grouting the shower (my weekend project), sweeping, taking out the trash, cleaning toilets, grocery shopping, or any of those lovely tasks. Don't kid yourselves. Those are not breaks.

So, what can one do when one needs a break? My first goal is NOT to run straight to food. That never makes me feel better, and it's far more likely to make me feel worse. But I have other things that work better.

First, we have the relaxing things that cost money, but they may just be worth it, especially if one's week has been really awful.

--Get a massage. Sure, an hour-long one will cost $60-$80, but try half an hour, and you'll get most of the same benefits.
--Go to a chiropractor. All that stress (or lots of sitting, bending over computers/papers/children) has likely thrown your back out of whack, and many forms of insurance pay for this.
--Go to a show. Live theatre's great, but movies work, too, as do concerts, orchestras, choirs, whatever. Go to a piano concert, and you might even work in a good nap.

What's this you say? You're broke? No problem! For every one thing that costs money, I have a ton of things that are free:

--Get a movie from the library. You won't believe the selection, even in a small-town library like mine. And it isn't just Schoolhouse Rock, either, although that stuff is very entertaining. If you can afford a buck more, go to Redbox.
--Go for a walk. You might want to time it when the sun isn't too hot (or skin damaging), but a walk by yourself can be a true boost. Just don't take your kids with you. Or at least don't take my kids with you.
--Play piano. Sure, it won't beat a piano concert, but it's still relaxing. If you don't have a piano--or any other instrument--just listen to music. Avoid the AC/DC for once, though. Relaxing is better.
--Read a book. Again, the library is your best bet. You can even download stuff on your Kindle, if you can figure out how.
--Make your house quiet. Give the kids something to do on their own for an hour, and shut off the TV, radio, phone, dishwasher. No wait, keep the dishwasher, and just lean your ear against it. Sounds just like you're back inside good ol' mom... comfy... warm... see, you're relaxing already.

If none of this strikes your fancy, don't stop trying. And don't put relaxing on the bottom of your list, or you won't ever get to it. And then you'll have no choice but to see a chiropractor. And he'll take one look at your spine and break out crying in pity. And he'll tell you it's too late--your bones are fused. Too much stress for too long. No breaks.

And you don't want that, do you?

So get out there and relax! And report back. I'm always looking for more ideas.

Stepping

Stepping back

From the schedule

From the expectations

To pull my children in

To a snuggle for the day

Stepping out

Into the sunshine

Warming skin in

Warming air

No ties

No tasks

No cares

Stepping over

The mountain

Made molehill

Just for the day

Stepping in

Into a world

Of mermaids

Of magic

Of writing

Stepping

Stepping softly

Through a world of hope

Where cares can wait

For stepping

In the future

A Relaxing Beginning

My class starts in about half an hour. I should be nervous. Or at least keyed up or something.

But I'm just sitting here, my stress level at about a two (on a ten-point scale)... nothing to do until class begins...

Why? Several reasons:

1. Preparation. That's all it is. I'd finished my syllabi two weeks ago, sent them off to be copied, and found the neat piles this morning, ready to hand out. All the assignments, readings, due dates, and other elements are organized. Nothing to figure out. Everything is just ready to run, like a well-oiled machine, and I'm looking forward to the adventure, the new students, and pretty much everything (except the grading).

2. Saying no. I turned down a total of four more classes this term, so while I'm surrounded by teachers running around trying to teach 5 or 6 courses, I'm just floating with two (three is full time, and I don't want to teach full time unless I get paid full time). Last fall at this time I was halfway through two courses by now, and I took on four more, finishing them all before December. No, I didn't end up strangling myself before it was over, but I nearly ended up in an asylum.

3. Doing things I love. Yes, instead of thinking about school starting yesterday, I painted. And when I get home this afternoon, I'll be working more on my novel. And playing piano. And reading. Anything I can do to make sure I enjoy the day as well as work through it.

I hope you are as relaxed as I. I hope that knot right below your shoulder blade eases itself out, and you can just chill with a lemonade this afternoon. That's what I intend to do.

The Calm at the End

Friday

No sound except

The soft clock ticking

Near the soft couch

With its soft burgundy pillows

Children off at school

Learning all they can

Forget in a weekend

Meeting friends they'll see again

In a few short days.

And I?

No tasks that must be done

No labors left remaining

Nothing necessary

Just myself

My cat

And a warm mug of tea to

Pull me out of panic

And unburden

My heavy mind.

It lightens

Even as I write

Until it is weightless

Drifting into a new adventure

A new world

For the taking

Where panic is invented

Suspense is extreme but unworldly

And the happy ending is all planned out.

The weekend awaits

Smiling

Its arms outstretched to embrace me.

Laughing

Thanks to several blogs, including Rocket Scientist and AmyOops, I started this morning in a good mood. Right now my kids are laughing downstairs, my husband is just getting up out of bed, and the sun even looks like it's going to pop out a little today (that's rare for October in Seattle).

All in all, these things make me feel ready to take on the world. I graded two classes' worth of essays yesterday (yes, it took all day--finished at 12:30 this morning), and now I plan to focus on getting enough rest and writing. Yes, I'm actually going to writing again! I do have a few tasks to perform, like writing a quick essay assignment sheet, laundry, cleaning the kitchen, etc., but overall I'm planning on writing, writing, and writing. I'm still too sick to go to my playwrights group meeting this afternoon, so my whole day should be only occasionally uninterrupted writing. 

Perhaps you think that writing and laughing are unconnected. Perhaps, at times, they are. Today, though, the laughing has put me in the right frame of mind to be happy, to relax, and to let some OCD things go that I would normally pay too much attention to. 

Oh, and now my kids have just turned on grunge band Christmas music, and they are dancing in the kitchen. This is going to be a great day!

(Now I'm off to join the dancing!)

Relaxing...

It's Friday, less than an hour before my kiddos pop off the big yellow school bus, and I've had quite a week! I could stress about the illness, the lice maintenance (still nitpicking!), the incessant paper grading, prepping for two new classes while finishing up two old classes, blah, blah, blah...

But I've been doing that a little too much lately. Instead, I'll just give you a link to Roy's World so that you can feel soothed, too, letting the music and swimming aquatic fantasy melt you into your chair. I watched that video through twice already, and I'll likely go back and watch it through a few more times. 

I'll do this if you do: I will do all I physically and psychically can to relax this weekend--to let go of all the crap that I've been storing in my very bones--and you do the same. I have a lot of options to choose from to help me along the way:

1. Get my papers graded today, before the weekend starts.

2. Convince my hubby to give me a massage.

3.  Listen to some new age music.

4. Set up a candle-lit dinner with my kids (they LOVE that!).

5.  Daydream about this new mermaid novel I've been thinking--not brainstorm, not outline, just daydream (no stress, remember).

6.  Sleep in late or turn in early (or both!).

7.  (Let my husband) build a fire in the fireplace and roast marshmallows.

8. Pet my cat.

9.  Watch a good movie.

10.  Read to my children.

Ready to relax? I know I am. Let me know what you plan to do to relax this weekend, and I'll keep you posted on my own progress towards peace of mind.

Nightmare

Just as de-stressing can involve a massage to calm one down (and if you want the quick massage, go to my previous post, where you get to take a mini-staycation), another way to ease one's stress is to try the opposite. Systematically, take each part of your body and tense up all the muscles. Hold it for a few seconds, then release. Such a method helps to direct your attention to each area, concentrating on releasing the tension once you've gotten yourself good and balled up.

So here it is: imagine the worst possible life. Then look around you and realize how much better your real life is. It's not too hard. Just take your stressors and explode them exponentially, and add on a bunch of stuff you are fortunate enough not to have to deal with.

My worst life? It would involve a house full of children--maybe ten or so would be enough to drive me absolutely insane--and all of them would be making noise of some kind, screaming, yelling at each other, crying, calling from the bathroom that they needed to be wiped, fighting over toys, even laughing (one could be laughing, anyway). They would also be tugging at me, at my clothing, pulling pans out of the kitchen cupboards, pulling food out of the refrigerator and dumping it everywhere, dragging stuff across the floors, breaking windows and chair legs and dishes, ripping clothing, scratching and hitting each other, tearing the house apart. I couldn't walk two steps without stepping or slipping on something--including toys, pins, rotting cherries, and dried juice spills, and nothing I touched would be clean. The house would smell of diapers--lots of diapers--and diarrhea, throw up, unwashed clothing, mold, and trash. My hair would be unwashed and greasy, and I'd smell of sweat because I hadn't bathed in days, and everything would be turned over or upset. The phone would ring constantly (I hate phones!), with every call being a telemarketer (I hate telemarketers!) and I'd have seven televisions blaring in various rooms, stacks of ungraded papers for classes lying everywhere, gathering dust and food and little kid fingerprints. 

Okay, I got myself good and tense. Now I can return to the much more blissful life that is mine: My two kids and my husband are still sleeping, and the only others awake are my aunt and her son, and they are trying to be quiet until everyone else is up. My house doesn't smell at all, unless its the faint odor of Pine-Sol (one of my favorite smells), and the sink is even empty of dirty dishes. The floors are clean, the air is quiet, I am writing this blog without hurry, and we are planning a day in a cute town not an hour from here, a day of sunshine and shopping and ice cream cones and walking. I have no papers to grade--not one!--and none in the near future, since right now I am not teaching. Sunshine is pouring in through the windows, and the day promises to be beautiful--mid-70's. Tonight I look forward to an evening with a bunch of other ladies to discuss Beauty, one of my favorite books ever.

I feel better. I can feel the tension in my neck, which had been building over the last few days, dissipate slowly. Life is good. I only have two kids. My husband is fabulous (mostly). I'm a very lucky woman.

Now you try it. And if you say you don't have time, MAKE time, for you probably need it even more than I. And go back to the last blog and do that exercise, too. You deserve it, and together they shouldn't take more than ten minutes (surely you have ten minutes to spend on self-indulgence!).  

So go ahead... What's your nightmare?