Correcting the World

I opened my mailbox this morning to find my daily astrology report:

Cheer up and have fun, Cheryl. You may not be able

to resist temptation today, so why fight the urge?

Going with the flow will lead you most likely into a

place of laugher and merriment. There is nothing

wrong with being a bit selfish once in a while. Feel

free to indulge. Your sensitive, outer-worldly personality

will find comfort in a decedent meal by candlelight.

Romance is your ticket to pleasure.

While I won't expound on the accuracy of the reading today (do I ever try to judge whether astrology is accurate?), I was pretty upset by the errors. I adore "going with the flow"--I've had Taoist leanings for about ten years now--but why in the world would I want "laugher"? What the hell is that, anyway?

And since when is decadent spelled "decedent"? Does the astrologer mean "decent"? That might fit better, given that I have two kids to share dinner with, I'm trying to lose a few pounds, and my husband will be coming home late from a meeting south of Seattle today. I'd be happy with a decent meal, honestly. It might even suit me better than a decadent one.

But it isn't just an astrologer who can't seem to handle the English language. Yesterday, an AP article about the shooting near Columbine had at least two grammatical errors. A blog this morning about the speed skating issues (involving the Koreans) ended in this way:

They may have backed into bronze, but as the fourth-best relay

team in the world. Don't say it wasn't earned.

Please don't ask me what's wrong with this. It should look like this:

They may have backed into bronze, but as the fourth-best relay

team in the world, don't say the medal wasn't earned.

Am I irate because I've been grading too many student papers lately? No. I'm upset because whoever is writing these articles is doing this for money--these people are PROFESSIONAL WRITERS--and their stuff is published with obvious disregard for editing.

Enough of my ranting. I'm off to mark up the newspaper with a red pen.

A Be Happy Day

Last night on the telephone, my husband called himself "lazy." Now, while there certainly are days when my husband does absolutely nothing but eat and watch football all day (and those days are coming up, since football season has begun), he called himself this after spending about 4 hours or so exercising--after work. It seems after going to the gym for about TWO HOURS he decided to put in some more effort running up and down a hiking trail to some falls near our home. These falls--Wallace Falls--are really spectacular, but even getting to the bottom falls (the lowest of the three hiking areas) takes about an hour... and he ran up to the third landing--the Upper Falls--and back down in about two hours total. 

And yet, after all that, he called himself lazy. 

Only the lord knows what he's looking at when he examines his day... and it reminds me of how typical it is for us to see the hole in our own beings--however small it is--and blast it out of proportion so that we can still think ill of ourselves. I can lose 90 lbs., yet still criticize myself for the tummy bulge I will always have. I once complimented a coworker of mine, a woman who was always gracious, always perfectly dressed, always beautifully put together. I told her how wonderful she looked--how wonderful she always looked, and she replied, "If only I could lose these last ten pounds." 

What the hell was she talking about? I wondered, skimming over her 5-foot-2, 100-pound frame. And yet this was what she was thinking. 

In graduate school it was the same: fellow students who received a test back and obsessed about the five points they'd missed, not the 95 points they'd managed to get. We are too hard on ourselves, too quick to judge ourselves to find the flaws.

Yet, I suppose, another alternative isn't so great, either (and you know this kind of person, too): This one is so busy finding the mote in other's eyes, so to speak, that he can't see the huge log sticking out of his own. Easy to feel good about one's self when one sees the rest of the world as so comparatively imperfect. 

I have a solution to all of this, though--it's one I work at for myself, at least, and it makes me much happier. I was reminded of it while checking e-mail this morning, for my daily astrology reading (through MSN) told me to keep being nice, to spread my joy and kindness around, since I was one of the sources of kindness remaining in the world (or roughly that, since I didn't save the reading). Here's my joy to share: You are a great person, as am I, and the more we concentrate on our talents, our inner joy, and what we do have, what we do well, the happier everyone will be. Instead of picking at yourself all day (or others, though you probably don't know who you are if you do that), find the all the good you can today. Write it down, if you have to, if the happy thoughts won't stick in your head for longer than a moment. 

Now, once the day is done, come back and share what you noticed. Spread your own happiness around a bit. I'll let you complain another day, but not today.